WHY IS IT IMPORTANT TO IMPROVE YOUR SELF?

Having looked at self improvement and success, unlocking your self improvement and how a positive attitude can change your life, I have not yet explained exactly why it is important to improve your self.

Sometimes, when we are totally wrapped up in all our doubts, fears and insecurities, we more often than not, come up with the thought “I wish I was somebody else.” We truly believe that most people are better than us- when in reality most people are thinking the same about us.

When you spot an incredible eye-catching girl sitting by herself at a party, casually sipping on a glass of Asti Spumanti how often do you think to yourself, “she looks so perfectly calm and confident.” But if you could see into her mind, you would see dark clouds of thoughts and you would be more than amazed to find out that she’s thinking “are people talking about why I am seated here alone?... Why don’t guys find me attractive? …I don’t like my ankles, they look too skinny… I wish I was as intelligent as my best friend.”

What about a young business entrepreneur, would you say “Wooh… what else could he ask for?” as eh stares at himself in the mirror and murmurs to himself, “I hate my big eyes… I wonder why my friends won’t talk to me… I hope mom and dad can still work things out.”

Isn’t it funny? We look at other people, envy them, for looking or being so outrageously perfect, and wish we could trade places with them, while they look at us and think the same thing. We are insecure when we see others we consider successful, beautiful or clever and strangely enough those people are thinking the same about us.

The majority of people suffer in one way or another with low self-esteem or a lack of self-confidence and therefore often lose hope in self improvement because they find themselves enveloped in quiet desperation and cannot see their way through.

One of Whitney Houston’s songs says “Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all.” True enough. In order to love others, you must love yourself too. Remember, you cannot give others what you do not have.

Before telling other people how they can improve themselves, let them see that you are a representation and a product of self improvement. Self improvement makes us better people, we then inspire other people, and then the rest of the world will follow.

Stop thinking of yourself as a second-rate being. Forget the repetitive thought of “If only I was richer… if only I was thinner” and so on. Accepting your true self is the first step to self improvement. We need to stop comparing ourselves to others only to find out at the end that we’ve got 10 more reasons to envy them.

We all have our insecurities. Nobody is perfect. We always wish we had better things, better features, better body parts, etc. But life does not need to be perfect for people to be happy about themselves. Self improvement and loving yourself is not a matter of shouting to the whole world that you are perfect and you are the best. It’s the virtue of acceptance and contentment. When we begin to improve ourselves, we then begin to feel contented and happy.

Self improvement is important because it opens us up to a world of opportunities that you would not have had the courage to do before self improvement. It expands your way of thinking and accepting people for who they are. You will attract more like minded people into your life once you change your way of thinking and seeing your world. Learning to love yourself is one of the hardest lessons of all but one of the most important. You cannot truly love another unconditionally until you accept yourself unconditionally. Accept the way you look, your quirky ways, your very being and enjoy being the person you are today. Then look forward to the person you want to be and enjoy the journey.

SELF IMPROVEMENT AND SUCCESS

Yesterday I spoke about unlocking your self-improvement power and today I want to talk about how self improvement can lead to success.

Everything that happens to us happens for a purpose and more often leads to something quite unexpected. Instead of locking yourself up in your cage of fears and crying over past heartaches, embarrassment and failures treat them as your teachers and they will become your tools in both self improvement and success.

I remember watching Patch Adams – such a cool movie - and thinking what incredible insights this movies gives into human psyche. If you haven’t seen it – you really should - Hunter “patch” Adams is a medical student who failed to make it through the board exams. After months of suffering in melancholy, depression and suicidal attempts – he decided to seek medical attention and voluntarily admits himself into a psychiatric ward. His months of stay in the hospital lead him to meet many different kinds of very sick people. He met a catatonic, mentally retarded people, a schizophrenic and so on. Patch found ways of treating his own ailment and finally realized it was time to get back on track. He woke up one morning realising that after all the failure and pains he had gone through, he still wanted to become a doctor. His most important asset, a positive attitude, and that brought him self improvement and success. He didn’t only improved himself, but also the lives of the people around him and his quality of life. Did he succeed? Needless to say, he became one of the best doctors his country had ever known.

So, when does self improvement become synonymous with success?
Where do we start?

Here are some tips……………

*Stop thinking and feeling as if you’re a failure, because you’re not. How can others accept you if YOU can’t accept YOU?

*When you see hunks and models on TV, think more on self improvement, not self pitying. Self acceptance is not just about having nice slender legs, or great abs. Concentrate on your own inner beauty.

*When people you know feel unhappy and low about themselves, help them move up. Don’t go down with them. They’ll pull you down further and you will all end up feeling inferior and dejected.

*The world is a huge classroom for lessons and mistakes help you learn. Don’t feel stupid and doomed forever just because you failed on a science test. There’s always a next time. Think about what you learned by failing that test. (You won’t make that mistake again, will you?) Make room for self improvement knowing that you are on the most amazing journey of life, full of adventure, fun and excitement, if you allow it.

*Take one thing one at a time. You don’t expect others to change overnight so don’t expect it of yourself. Self improvement is a one day at a time process.

*Self improvement results in inner stability, personality development and then …. SUCCESS. Success comes from self confidence, self appreciation and self esteem.

* Set meaningful and achievable goals. Self improvement will not turn you into an exact replica of Cameron Diaz or Ralph Fiennes. It is about, finding your own individual beauty and personality that you have hidden within, and creating an improved and better YOU.

*Little things mean a lot to other people. Sometimes, we don’t realise that the little things that we do, like a pat on the back, a smile, saying “hi”, “hello” or “good day” to someone or telling Mr. Smith something like “hey, I love your tie!” are simple things that mean so much to other people. When we’re being appreciative about beautiful things around us and other people, we also become beautiful to them and we feel wonderful inside, so go out and spread some joy each and every day.

*When you’re willing to accept change and go through the process of self improvement, it doesn’t mean that everyone else is. The world is a place where people of different values and attitude exist. Sometimes, even if you think you and your best friend always like to do the same things, together, at the same time, it is more than likely that she would decline your invitation to join you on your journey of self improvement. We are individuals and can only go through such changes when we are ready, but don’t give up on your friends if they react this way, it could very likely happen that, as you progress and they see the changes in you, they could be inspired to do the same.

It’s always a reassuring feeling to hold on to the things that you are familiar with and change can be quite traumatic but, if you are ready, throw away the fears and worries and enjoy. A very famous quote says that “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” We are all here to learn our lessons. Our parents, school teachers, friends, colleagues, officemates, neighbors… they are our teachers. When we open our doors for self improvement, those who are to help us on our way will appear and we will journey onwards knowing that we are heading towards success and happiness.